The Secret to Date Nights
Date night. It seems so simple before that first child is born. Of course we’ll keep going out on dates, we think…. maybe not quite as often, but at least once a month, or even weekly. It is hard to imagine losing sight of the importance of special time together as a couple.
As we transition from partners to parents, however, often we set aside time together in favor of time as a family. We are busy, tired, overwhelmed, enraptured…until the day comes when we gaze at each other not with adoration but rather the question – who are we now? What does it mean to be parents and partners?
We all know how important it is, we just don’t always feel we have a way to make it happen. Here are a few wise ideas we’ve gleaned from couples we know:
Scheduled Date Nights
Imagine enjoying a date every Monday night. Childcare is arranged, it’s on the calendar, all you have to do is enjoy. The secret here is that it Has to be scheduled. You know how quickly time can go by – don’t let another 4 months pass without a date. Set your intent together and put the support you need in place to make it happen.
Supper Club
If childcare is an issue for you, consider inviting 3 other neighborhood families to form a supper club. Set a weekly time – perhaps a Sunday dinner, or a Saturday brunch. One family will host all the children, cook, and clean-up. One family serves as helpers to the host family, but not with cooking or cleanup. The other two couples drop off their children and go out on a date! This model allows not only for 2 scheduled dates per month, but also 2 wonderful evenings shared with another couple and children who truly look forward to this time together.
Simplicity Dating
Maybe at this time in your lives you want to keep it simple. Pick a night to be your weekly date. On that night one of you will put the children to sleep. The other will light the fire & candles, spread out a picnic blanket in the living room, and order in your favourite takeout. Enjoy!
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When was your last date?
What helps you bring the romance into your life as parents?
[...] We’ve written about this topic before, including our posts Changing Relationships and The Secret to Date Nights. We’re even hosting a special workshop this summer on Changing Relationships. Clearly, this [...]
We signed up for yoga together. At first my husband was a little leary of being potentially the only guy in the class but now he loves it. While my sister watches the kids, we get an hour every Tuesday to relax and stretch together, and grab a coffee afterwards.
FYI: he was not the only guy in the class.
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